Well, it's been on a trickle-charger for the past 24 hours, and the battery is shot. (The multitester shows 12V across the terminals with the bike off, but ZERO with the bike on; once it's under load, it falls flat on its face -- the gauges don't light up, nothing.)
All I can figure is that I blew it when I replaced the battery earlier this year. It came with the wrong instructions, so I didn't know that I was supposed to add BOTH vials of acid. Instead, I poured in just one of them, charged it overnight, and had a 6V battery the next day. Then I added the other vial of acid and charged it, and all seemed to be well.
Would that have done permanent chemical damage to the battery to reduce its lifespan to just a couple months? Or might my dead-as-a-doornail battery just indicate some other, deeper problem?